One of the worst situations you could possibly encounter while playing a round of golf is the need to poop when you are on the corner of the course, out in the open, with the clubhouse nowhere in sight. The frantic realization when this happens is the stuff of nightmares.
You may have already been in this scenario. Perhaps it worked out okay, or maybe you were uncomfortable to the point that it affected your game. If that’s the case, or you’re worried you might face this situation in the future, review this information in case the garbage hits the fan mid-round.
Here’s a quick answer to the question: yes, you should poop before you play a round. There is no real advantage to be gained by not doing so, only downsides. Here are a few reasons why you should perform this relieving task before you start out on the course for the day.
You could be away from a bathroom for 5+ hours
A lot of golf courses will not have toilet facilities once you leave the clubhouse. This means that it is just you and Mother Nature for five plus hours if you are playing a full round.
If you are staying well-hydrated by sipping on water before and throughout your round, you will probably need to take a pee break at some stage during your round. When your bladder comes calling, you can’t really ignore it when you still have seven holes to play. In this situation, you can usually find a private place off the beaten track on a hole where you can relieve yourself discreetly. This is one of the many reasons why you should carry hand sanitizer in your bag, by the way.
But poops can be trickier though, as there is nothing very discrete about them and it can often be a messy affair. Make sure you try to take a poop before your round even if you feel like you don’t need to, as once you are out on the course you are on your own.
Your nerves might play up on you
Whenever some people are faced with a high-pressure situation, they find it hard to hold food down. Often this results in a quick and messy evacuation. You could be fine one second and the next need to urgently relieve yourself — it often hits without a lot of warning.
In order to avoid this, it’s a good idea to stay away from foods and drinks that do not digest well with you. Try to consistently eat the same thing before each of your rounds. Things like coffee, for example, are known culprits for creating a ropey stomach.
If you’re playing in your first high-profile tournament, for example, you may be nervous on the tee box or over the certain shot. All of a sudden, you’re struck with bowels that need to be emptied. This is why you should do your best to get everything out before you begin your round. Make sure you have wet wipes with you for the clean-up.
You had a large pre-round meal
Playing a round of golf is often a full-day affair. Playing partners meet in the clubhouse for a meal before the round, they play 18 holes, then they have another meal with a few drinks in the clubhouse later on.
When you eat a big heavy meal before you play, you’ll be digesting it in your stomach during your round. And eventually, you’ll need to poop. Minimize the amount of discomfort you may have out on the golf course by emptying your bowels ahead of time, as well as not overeating during meals.
— Andrew O’Malley